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My "Bitten" Review (from TSM Radio) 

bittendvdcoverTitle: Bitten [Japanese title: Kanuonna]
A.K.A.: Lady Is A Vamp
Directed by: Harv Glazer
Starring: Jason Mewes, Erica Cox, Richard Fitzpatrick, Jordan Madley, Nic Nac, Stuart Stone
Runtime: 89 minutes
Release Date: June 29, 2008 (UK) / December 10, 2008 (Japan: DVD)

[STORY] (Quoted from RHI Entertainment.)
Jack (Jason Mewes, Clerks) doesn't hold out much hope for a personal life. His ex-girlfriend s on his back. He lives in a miserable tenement. His slumlord s hounding him for late rent. Worse yet, he works the graveyard shift as a paramedic. The only strangers he ever meets are junkies and psychos with bullet wounds. How can he possibly meet someone decent between midnight and dawn? The closest he gets is Danika, a real knock out he finds dumped in an alley with strange bite marks on her neck in the throes of death. Back at his place, cleaned up and calmed down, she s a real beauty, and extremely grateful for a place to crash. She s still a little shaky, rather pale, and kind of weak. Poor thing. Roger hopes he s not right, but Danika does seem hooked on something bad.

Official Site: RHI Entertainment, IMDb
Watched on: 2008/12/20 [on DVD]
My rating: 4 out of 5

Go visit the special page for Bitten! (Click on the image below.)
She Can't Control Her Thirst...

The Japanese version ----> CLICK HERE
This is my movie review for "Bitten" from TSM Radio Show 155 [during CableGuyJeff's F*ckin' Five Minutes].

WARNING: This review contains a lot of spoilers. If you are ok with it, feel free to read this review.




Audio (read by CableGuyJeff): Click here

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.....So, changing the subject, I finally purchased the Japanese DVD for "Bitten". This is the first film directed by Harv Glazer, which came to Japan on DVD. The buzzword for the movie was "Too immoral, too sexy - The dangerous stimulation goes through your five senses - The best erotic horror has come!" The Japanese trailer was so cheesy but funny. I did not expect anything because I already saw the "Making of Bitten" stuff, and knew that was the vampire comedy horror film. And you know what? I LOVED IT. That was one of the funniest movies I've ever seen!

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There were lots of sense of humors in it, and it looks like the erotic horror assimilates into black comedy. The acting, music, and story was awesome, although there were some kind of plot holes and women bashing, such as "woman keep talking, women has a lot of luggage, women demands too much, women never give up, etc". I'm a female but it's all good. Stu Stone and Jamie Rise did a great job in composing music.....That means they have excellent taste in music. It was good to hear several songs by Tarzana in the movie! My favorites are "Bad Reaction" and "Sugar".

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I bursted out laughing when the "Tidy up your mess" song suddenly started playing, where the scene which the paramedic Jack (played by Jason Mewes) tried to cover up his ex-girlfriend's body and clean up the mess. That song played again when Stu's character Twitch's body was being cover up to the wardrobe. My mother said, "Wow, that guy is in the movie? He dies? Oh sorry to hear your favorite actor just gets bitten in it. Wait, his song is playing in his own death scene! That's weird." The song has been stuck on my head when I'm working and cleaning up the mess, and I feel like singing lol

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Left: Stuart Stone (as Twitch), Right: Nic Nac (as Pusher)

Stu's death scene was kind of funny because, you know, he was f*cked.....I mean, dead-f*cked. If his character came back to life as a vampire, that would be hilarious. The conversation between Twitch and Pusher (played by Nic Nac) made me laugh so much that I couldn't breathe. I mean, "the second pussy" talk was such a small comedic dialogue.

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The best performer was Richard Fitzpatrick playing Jack's sidekick Roger because his acting had a vein of humor - He always talked about sh*ts, a$$es and his anal obesssion. His performance cracked me up so hard.

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Erica Cox, who played the vampire chick Danika, was beautiful but her eyes scared me sometimes and I felt like being swallowed up in them. If you are into vampires and boobs, you'll enjoy it. Love scenes were a little bit unworthy of expectation though.

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I saw the movie not only in English but also in Japanese Dub. I felt somewhat out of place in the Japanese voice of Twitch but I found it funny! His voice doesn't fit Stu's actual voice but his character itself. One of the professional Japanese voice-over actors who played Pusher showed a low-keyed performance.

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But the funniest thing from the movie was the ending credits, especially when A.B.S. and I were on the credits! "She Looks At Me" - performed by Stu Stone Feat. Haruka From Japan and ABS? I was very surprised and excited! Thank you Stu! Why isn't this movie released in the US? It should be soon!

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Some people savage this film but I meet harsh criticism with a smile. Those people expected too much or didn't find or enjoy the humor. My rating is: 4 out of 5 stars.

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Well I gotta go now. Sorry for my long letter and review again, but I just want to say I was so happy to see Stu Stone on screen. He often gets some f*cked-up roles but he learns his characters properly. That means his acting is very good. Good-bye and hope to see you on Sunday! From Haruka xoxo


The Official US Poster:
bitten_us.jpg
Scary.

Making of Bitten:

I think this shoud be featured on DVD!!
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2017-06
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